Real Talk w/Terry (formerly Relationships-411)

I Have My King’s Back

Will-Jada Smith_2

The other day I saw a Facebook post that had the following quote from Jada Pinkett – Smith, Will Smith’s wife, I always walk three steps behind him to his left. Anything that comes toward him from behind, I encounter first. I can clearly see what advances to his right and his left. I also have my sights on what approaches ahead. If I stand beside my King, I can only focus on what’s ahead and if he swings his sword…I will surely be struck. Three steps behind is the most powerful position for a Queen.”

This post garnered a lot of likes and a lot of comments. I myself was humored at the part of her statement that read “if I stand beside my King, I can only focus on what’s ahead and if he swings his sword… I will surely be struck.” After reading the post a couple of times, I myself was compelled to make a comment. First and foremost, I did not think that Jada was literally speaking of walking three steps behind Will, I do believe – like most other readers and those who made comments that she was speaking figuratively. And my response was from a spiritual angle, “That’s a similar protocol for England’s royalty … I’d like to think my King has my back. Which is why my husband always sits facing the door of where we are to protect me from oncoming danger in his words”. As I mentioned in my comment, the protocol that Jada is speaking of – walking 3 steps behind “her King” is protocol very similar to that of the British Monarchy. And the motive behind this practice is out of respect, not for additional protection. Her statement sounds great in theory and figuratively speaking, but we as Christians are warned to be careful of leaven bread – half truths and deceptive teaching that is eloquently stated but have no spiritual foundation. [Matthew 16:12] The bible clearly states that God created woman from the rib of man – from his side – she was created to be a help-meet for man; a helper, not a protector. [Genesis 2:18, 21-23].

Everything that sounds good to us, is not necessarily good for us. Quite honestly, and with all due respect, her statement makes no sense and is not biblically based at all. As children of God, we have to be careful that we do not fall prey to schemes of the enemy through the use of eloquent words, phrases or leaven bread. The bible warns beware of the teachings of Pharisees and Sadducees.

Additional Reading

Royal Protocol & Etiquette

Couple of the Week – June Recap

These are the lovely couples that were featured in June as Couple of the Week. They all shared great marriage nuggets and wisdom.

Darryl-EveLynnDarryl & Eve-Lynn

Darryl and Eve-Lynn just celebrated three years of marital bliss on May 26, 2015.

Word of Wisdom to Couples: “If there is advice to be given to married couples, it would be this, first follow the fruit of the Spirit. Then listen – listen to what is being said and how it is being said.”

Michael-Alice

Michael & Alice

Married August 19, 2000

Michael and Alice have been married for 14 years. Their words of wisdom for a newly married couple: “I have discovered that understanding my personality type helps me communicate effectively with my husband. Wow! I should’ve taken that test 11 years ago! I urge newly-weds to save themselves years of frustration, communication breakdowns and personality clashes by taking a personality test sooner rather than later. Even if your spouse won’t commit to taking the test, take it for yourself and learn about personality dynamics and be flexible to prevent severe taxation on your marriage.”

PastorAndre-FayeButler

Pastors Andre & Faye Butler

The couple recently celebrated 39 years of marriage this past April. They stated, “the key to our success [in marriage] is persevering during the hard times which allows us to enjoy the good times now.”

If you would like to be featured as our Couple of the Week, email info@terrycato.com and put Couple of the Week in the email header. Include a picture of you and your spouse and 2-3 sentences sharing a piece of advice or wisdom with other couples.

Loving Your Spouse through a Chronic Illness

When a couple recites their wedding vows and repeats the line “in sickness and in health, ‘til death do us part”. I’m sure rarely, if ever, do they think that they may actually find themselves or their spouse suffering from a chronic illness. They like many of us, go through the motions of the moment without fully considering the “what if”. Someone very close to me, my husband’s sister recently received a kidney transplant. Everyone close to her was simply overwhelmed with joy because what we had been praying and believing God for had finally happened! Prior to receiving her transplant, my sister-in-law had been on dialysis for over 10 years. After numerous hospital stays, medical procedures and doctor’s visits she finally got the call that so many never receive – that there was a donor. One person’s tragedy – another person’s blessing.

I asked my sister-in-law and her husband to share with couples words of wisdom and encouragement should they find themselves in a situation where they are either battling a chronic illness or married to someone who is. Read more…

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